sung to the tune of red, red, wine

because it's been raining for about 40 day and 40 nights little children
all our firewood is wet.
not just a little wet.
but soaked to the bone wet
(does wood have bone?)

in any event, wet wood does not like fire
fire does not like wet wood.
rock and scissors are remaining neutral.
but paper, well paper can only do so much.

perhaps i should pretend i'm in scotland
and burn moss in the fireplace.
if i had any moss.

35+ scotches
3 cigars
1 full buffet at the ritz-carlton

somewhere angels smiled down

and her name was the macallan amber

so new it won't be released until next week.
so round.
so firm.
so fully compact.

oh happy day...
i might even decide to eat oatmeal everyday
just to pay homage

fine. it's 10/27 and i'm going back and writing
about the wedding
and honeymoon

shesh. so much has happened.
i took notes in barbados
(lest i forget my honeymoon)

did i mention calling 911 in the miami airport
because i'd gotten stung by a bee in barbados?
4 emt's showed up and recommended i apply
...benedryl

$100K for med school, my ass

it's hot hot hot in scenic barbados.
and coconut court room #37 ain't air conditioned.

but as a married woman,
i think i handled the situation with aplomb
(i drank heavily)

holy bat guts...i'm married

started my new job today...
and managed to NOT get into a horrific traffic accident
which puts me back into the 1 out of 2 category

whew

it was a bit dicey when the ceo invited me to lunch
but i got into the back seat not the passenger side
and there were no left turns at traffic lights

(damn you, conversent communications)

everyone was extremely nice at the job.
as i'm only working 3 days then taking
2 weeks off for my honeymoon.
not a bad gig.

at the beginning of the day the wedding was a big topic of discussion
when i was introduced to people
and it took oh, about 2 minutes, for people to skid to a halt
and say...so...um...where are you going on your...um...er....trip?

time it took to walk around the building shaking hands: 28 minutes
time it took for the WHOLE building to know there is no *husband*: 37 seconds

hope and lisa got married today
at the danversport yacht club

it was very top drawer
(kindly said without moving the jaw)

the brides were stunning
the weather was amazing
and the entertainment of the 4 watts
dancing backup to hope as she sang
to lisa...well, let's just say
lavender boas and sunglasses
can make anyone a star.

not that we'll quit our day jobs.
if we had one.

5-6-7-8
sweep 2-3-4
left, LEFT